Last MondayI had a wonderful workout. First time in a long time that I was able to walk quickly for 25 minutes and even able to do some of the weight machines without being in extreme pain. I felt life was looking up. Even if I do have this cancer I was not going to let it stop my from living my life now.
Then came Tuesday. My husband and I lived through one of the most horrific situations a parent could ever face. I am not going to get into great detail, but that situation was more terrible than anything I have ever faced on this cancer journey. Just know that our boy is now just fine and many nights resting comfortably between my husband and I. Even if we are not so comfortable, but that's what being a parent is all about.
I was getting to the point of feeling pretty comfortable taking the boys out by myself. I felt I had the strength to be able to handle them. They are even getting a little better about listening to me and holding my hand. However, that experience last week just made me rethink that. I am now much more nervous about taking them out for fear that one will get out of my sight and I will not be quick enough to get to him. This is something I need to get over for the good of everyone.
Some fairly good news on the cancer front. I don't have breast cancer. Why would I be worried about that? Well, the BRCHA 1 (I hope I used the right letters, I am terrible with those) gene mutation puts me at a higher risk for breast cancer. So, since I was diagnosed in 2011, I have been alternating an MRI and mammograms every 6 months. I had also been doing to CA-125 blood test which checks for Ovarian Cancer, however that just snuck in between tests. I just had the mammogram last week and everything came back just fine in the boob department. I am just praying it stays that way. Since I still have the persistent cancer in the liver and spleen I do not need it starting on my boobs too. I do not want to go under the knife again for fear that the cancer will multiply again.
Here's hoping I can keep up with the physical strength and get my mental strength back as well.